Its a new year and new beginning. What will this year hold for me? I dont know, I could have never predicted what happened in 2009. But I am looking forward to it!
A few things I do know are happening this year, my best friend is bringing two beautiful little miracles into this world in the next month! I know that the love of my life will be moving and we will be able to see one another every day and no more pain and heartache on sundays. No more teary morning phone calls :) I know that my youngest nephew turns 10 and my oldest turns 20 his year. Hard to believe...I will be 27 years old. Luke and I will have been dating a year on May 24. My parents will have their 45 wedding anniversary! Wow, isn't that incredible? THey're amazing, and such role models for me to have grown up with, what a wonderful model marraige, two people who love each other unconditionally and have stuck by one another through bad times and good, sickness and financial troubles. And 45 years later they're still in love, they're still best friends, and what wonderful parents they have been. I am so proud to be their daughter.
Im looking forward to 2010. I think this is going to be a great year filled with blessings and wonderful things. Life can be hard, but it is also beautiful and wonderful.
I have been blessed with an amazing and supportive family, the best friends I could have ever imagined, and God lead me to a wonderful man who loves me unconditionally. EVery day I thank God for these people, if everyone was so lucky to have these types of people in their lives the world would be a much happier place.
God has great things in store for me, I know, Im trying to listen and hear what he is telling me and see the road he is leading me down. I feel at peace with where I am headed these days. It took me a little while to get here, but I am here. God is good, patience is key, he's always talking to you and trying to show you....
Ps 27:14, "Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD."
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
PRK
I have always had bad eyesight, I got my first glasses right befor emy 8th birthday and never looked back. Im not even sure I remember not ever having to have some kind of corrective eye lense. I got my first pair of contacts at age 12 and REALLY never looked back...Well they have progressively gotten worse and worse since then. This year at my annual eye appointment my Dr. suggested we go have a consultation for laser eye surgery. Well we've been through this and I was terribly disappointed when the surgeon informed me that my eyes were too far gone, that she wouldnt consider me as a patient and that I should wait 5-10 years down the road when a transplant option may be available. I was heart broken, so we decided to go to another laser center in Lubbock. Lo and behold they decided to take me on as a candidate for PRK (Photorefractive keratectomy) the most invasive form of laser corrective eye surgery and I decided to do it. THe fear was that in the next 10 years contacts would no longer be an option for me and my glasses were SO THICK, oh my gosh. I had to wear them for like 3 months befor the surgery I cried when I came home from the Dr with my new, ridiculously thick glasses. I did learn to like them though, I think I photographed well in them lol and from the front they werent nearly as thick, or at least didnt look that way. Everyone was great and encouraging and supportive so that helped.
So here I am in glasses, for the first time since I was 12...
So On Friday, November 6, 2009, my life was changed. Mom and I drove early that morning to Lubbock and got to the laser surgery, i got right in, filled out all the required paperwork, and got prepped for surgery. When the surgeon came in to meet me, they had already taken my glasses from me, so I couldnt make out his face at ALL, i had no idea what my surgeon looked like. They were all very kind and encouraging. They lead me into the laser room and I layed down in the chair, the nurses/aids were everywhere, it was a very well oiled machine- everyone had their place and their job- the surgeon walked me through what was going to happend and when and what to expect, so my eyes are numbed at this point but they numbed them even more and begame the surgery, left eye first. Laser was on that eye for 80 seconds. That is probably the oddest sensation I've ever had in my life. then the right eye, 84 seconds on that eye. After they cleaned off my eyes, buffed them and what not I sat up and I could see the surgeons face! Seriously I went in there seeing a glob of colors...and 164 seconds of a laser I could SEE faces! INcredible. So after 45 min-an hour "recovery" time (mom could not believe I could see things like the time on the clock on the wall) We went to the hotel and laid around all day, I was supposed to sleep but i was so keyed up and anxious I didnt get much sleeping done. So I watched TV :) we spent the night in Lubbock, got up went to a follow up Saturday morning then headed back to Midland.
This was my awesomely cool eye gear after surgery.
I was out of work a week, and few days after that week 1/2 days and what not. My eye sight has improved incredibly, BUT im still not at 20/20- two months later I am still healing and every day is different, I have good days and bad. my eyes switch one minute my left eye is clear the next it is not...but My Dr says that is normal and will fade over time. Im hoping in the next 2-3 months I will be able to get a glasses presciption and see things crisp again. It was a great decision, even with the problems I have been having, its better than relying on contacts and glasses to see anything. I dont have to worry now about getting up in the middle of thenight and walking into a wall, and if I do walk into a wall its not my eyes fault :)
So here I am in glasses, for the first time since I was 12...
So On Friday, November 6, 2009, my life was changed. Mom and I drove early that morning to Lubbock and got to the laser surgery, i got right in, filled out all the required paperwork, and got prepped for surgery. When the surgeon came in to meet me, they had already taken my glasses from me, so I couldnt make out his face at ALL, i had no idea what my surgeon looked like. They were all very kind and encouraging. They lead me into the laser room and I layed down in the chair, the nurses/aids were everywhere, it was a very well oiled machine- everyone had their place and their job- the surgeon walked me through what was going to happend and when and what to expect, so my eyes are numbed at this point but they numbed them even more and begame the surgery, left eye first. Laser was on that eye for 80 seconds. That is probably the oddest sensation I've ever had in my life. then the right eye, 84 seconds on that eye. After they cleaned off my eyes, buffed them and what not I sat up and I could see the surgeons face! Seriously I went in there seeing a glob of colors...and 164 seconds of a laser I could SEE faces! INcredible. So after 45 min-an hour "recovery" time (mom could not believe I could see things like the time on the clock on the wall) We went to the hotel and laid around all day, I was supposed to sleep but i was so keyed up and anxious I didnt get much sleeping done. So I watched TV :) we spent the night in Lubbock, got up went to a follow up Saturday morning then headed back to Midland.
This was my awesomely cool eye gear after surgery.
I was out of work a week, and few days after that week 1/2 days and what not. My eye sight has improved incredibly, BUT im still not at 20/20- two months later I am still healing and every day is different, I have good days and bad. my eyes switch one minute my left eye is clear the next it is not...but My Dr says that is normal and will fade over time. Im hoping in the next 2-3 months I will be able to get a glasses presciption and see things crisp again. It was a great decision, even with the problems I have been having, its better than relying on contacts and glasses to see anything. I dont have to worry now about getting up in the middle of thenight and walking into a wall, and if I do walk into a wall its not my eyes fault :)
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Football has come and gone
The family, Luke and I went to a few football games this season...I love football.
One reason I knew Luke was for me is when I got him talking abut football, fits right in with the family and always something to talk about! I always knew I woul dhave to find a man who enjoyed sports, and boy does he ever! I introduced him to Texas Tech football this year, even though he is an LSU fanatic - he accepted the challenge of attempting to be a Red Raider fan, and endure the roller coaster ride with me :) In return he introduced me to LSU and Saints football and I am growing accustomed to the idea that someday we will probably have a Purple/GOld or Black/Gold room in our house :)
My parents had tickets to a few games and Luke was able to go with us to a couple of them, as well as my Dad's brother (Uncle Charles) and his family! Mike played flag football againt this year too, its so fun to watch! They just run around and grin...too cute. I love football! Sad that it is over now...here are some pictures from out football adventures....
Brian, Mom, Dad, Aaron, Marcel, Me, Donna, Aunt Iris & Uncle Charles
"Guns Up!"
Michael tearing it up on the flag football field! :) Always with a grin on his face....
Me and Mom... I love this picture
He is such a brat! I had no idea he was making that face and everyone around was laughing their rearends off...lol brat! We retook the picture though :) and he behaved!
One reason I knew Luke was for me is when I got him talking abut football, fits right in with the family and always something to talk about! I always knew I woul dhave to find a man who enjoyed sports, and boy does he ever! I introduced him to Texas Tech football this year, even though he is an LSU fanatic - he accepted the challenge of attempting to be a Red Raider fan, and endure the roller coaster ride with me :) In return he introduced me to LSU and Saints football and I am growing accustomed to the idea that someday we will probably have a Purple/GOld or Black/Gold room in our house :)
My parents had tickets to a few games and Luke was able to go with us to a couple of them, as well as my Dad's brother (Uncle Charles) and his family! Mike played flag football againt this year too, its so fun to watch! They just run around and grin...too cute. I love football! Sad that it is over now...here are some pictures from out football adventures....
Brian, Mom, Dad, Aaron, Marcel, Me, Donna, Aunt Iris & Uncle Charles
"Guns Up!"
Michael tearing it up on the flag football field! :) Always with a grin on his face....
Me and Mom... I love this picture
He is such a brat! I had no idea he was making that face and everyone around was laughing their rearends off...lol brat! We retook the picture though :) and he behaved!
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Summer ended...Fall begins
What a Great summer it was! Lots of fun things happened this summer. Brian and I drove to Ft Davis to meet Mom, Dad and Mike for the weekend in June. It was a good time! Always fun to camp out and relax with the family. Michael loves that place.
The Mobley's had our first reunion in many many years in August! It was SO great for everyone that could be there to get together. It was miserably hot and humid, but we had awesome food and great company. I was in charge of putting it together and this year Im hoping to make it bigger and better....speaking of I should sart getting ideas for locations of the reunion. Reunion 2009 was in San Angelo at San Angelo State park. Here are a few pictures from the day.
The biggest thing that happened this summer was I fell head ofer heels in love with the most perfect man in the world for me. Luke Benjamin Ellis. THis man has changed my life in many positive ways, God brought us together in the most crucial time for both of us. This is the man I plan to spend my life with. We had a great summer, getting to know each other, talking for hours on end and falling in love.
I went to the races with Skye and Kip and the gang for the first time this summer. It was a lot of fun, it was a special event night so there were SO MANY people there, but we had a good time filled with great food, beer, cars and awesome company. Here are a few pictures of the day/night at the races.
My birthday was July 30, 26 years old...MAN time flies! I can't believe Im in my late 20's! I got these wonderful flowers from Luke for my birthday, they came a week early (to my office) haha! But that was great because I was able to enjoy them all week and make all the other ladies jealous. I will say this much, not only were they beautiful BUT they stayed that way for like 3 weeks! I have never in my life had flowers last that long. Job well done babe! :) (He was very proud of himself. )
The Mobley's had our first reunion in many many years in August! It was SO great for everyone that could be there to get together. It was miserably hot and humid, but we had awesome food and great company. I was in charge of putting it together and this year Im hoping to make it bigger and better....speaking of I should sart getting ideas for locations of the reunion. Reunion 2009 was in San Angelo at San Angelo State park. Here are a few pictures from the day.
The biggest thing that happened this summer was I fell head ofer heels in love with the most perfect man in the world for me. Luke Benjamin Ellis. THis man has changed my life in many positive ways, God brought us together in the most crucial time for both of us. This is the man I plan to spend my life with. We had a great summer, getting to know each other, talking for hours on end and falling in love.
I dont know what else to say about this summer but that it was wonderful! Possibly one of the best summers of my adult life anyway :) It definately gives me more hope for the future and I count my blessings and Thank God every day for all of these amazing gifts he has given me.....
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
new life, GOD, random feelings
Six months ago I was in a bad place. I was sad, I was unemployed, I was irritated with life, with work, with myself and I was alone, at least I felt alone. I made some choices that were probably not the best of choices. I was kind of a mess, on the inside at least. Few knew what a mess I was.
Today I am at peace, I am happy, I am loved, I am employed, Im happy with myself and I am in a wonderful peaceful spiritual place in life. Its amazing the changes that can come along with a simple open heart and open mind and by listening to God.
The first thing I had to do to change myself was get a job where, maybe the money wasn’t the most important thing, and maybe the work itself isn’t even important, but the environment itself is a calm, pleasant one. I found it. In the meantime this meant I needed to move, since money wasn’t an important factor in this new job, no longer could I afford the new, fancy apartment. So I have moved. The most important thing I needed to do was reevaluate my life, my relationship with God and with people. Well this is an on going process, and I’ll never stop evaluating this or changing it or trying to improve my own self image and my relationship with my Creator. But in the mean time, while I am working to improve these things I have found a few other diamonds. I have met someone and am no longer in the “alone” state of my life. He has shown me that even as early and soon as it may seem, my life will never be the same again. I have found my equal, someone who can put me in my place, because he’s just like me J someone who makes me laugh and in recent weeks, my day is not complete until I’ve heard his voice. Someone who I feel safe, secure, relaxed and amazing with and at the same time have butterflies just thinking of his face.
A few weeks ago I was sitting at my desk at work, a normal day at work, annoyed with co-workers, boss is yelling, trying to get my stuff done and I received an email froma friend, I get them everyday, its an online journal “GOD Issues”. In this particular journal entry, I don’t remember exactly the scripture or the topic of the entire entry, but there was a statement within the entry about God’s love for me. God loves me no matter what, no matter how I behave, whether or not I have the perfect job, whether or not I have the most expensive apartment in town, whether or not I have a good or bad day. GOD loves me, accepts me, knows me, HE created me—what else is there ot ask for? Why should I care about what others do or say? HIS opinion is what matters. I know He loves me. I know that he put me here to make the best decisions I could and live the best life I can. Its me and HIM. So I have this realization, I got up from my computer, went out in to the hallway to the bathroom and had to stop and hold on the railing. I felt as though I might fall over, I teared up, and suddenly I was at total peace. A peace I’ve not felt in a long time. I suddenly knew that I am OK. I am going to be OK. Things are going to go the way they are supposed to go and if by chance they do not, well it’s going to be fine because I’ll choose another path, and God will be by my side to muster through that forest just as he has all the others. Why should I feel sorry for myself? Why should I feel bad about my life? I am blessed beyond measure and am continually blessed. I have an amazing friends, they’re not even friends, they are my family. My blood family is wonderful and amazing and inspiring in every way. And I have brand new people in my life that God and only God placed in my path to walk with and muster through the storms with for reasons that only God knows, and I am finding out along the way.
Things were out of sync for a while, I was making decisions and thinking in ways that I have learned from and grown from---finally things are looking to be amazing. The life I’ve always KNOWN I was meant to live is before me and I am in a better place now than I have been in many many months. I feel as though I am Katie D’Ann Mobley again, there for a while I was just an altered version. Now, thanks to God’s love and inspiration and guidance, I am back to me.
So bring on the rain! I am ready to battle the storm, I’ll make it to that beautiful rainbow some how, someway, I will make it there.
Today I am at peace, I am happy, I am loved, I am employed, Im happy with myself and I am in a wonderful peaceful spiritual place in life. Its amazing the changes that can come along with a simple open heart and open mind and by listening to God.
The first thing I had to do to change myself was get a job where, maybe the money wasn’t the most important thing, and maybe the work itself isn’t even important, but the environment itself is a calm, pleasant one. I found it. In the meantime this meant I needed to move, since money wasn’t an important factor in this new job, no longer could I afford the new, fancy apartment. So I have moved. The most important thing I needed to do was reevaluate my life, my relationship with God and with people. Well this is an on going process, and I’ll never stop evaluating this or changing it or trying to improve my own self image and my relationship with my Creator. But in the mean time, while I am working to improve these things I have found a few other diamonds. I have met someone and am no longer in the “alone” state of my life. He has shown me that even as early and soon as it may seem, my life will never be the same again. I have found my equal, someone who can put me in my place, because he’s just like me J someone who makes me laugh and in recent weeks, my day is not complete until I’ve heard his voice. Someone who I feel safe, secure, relaxed and amazing with and at the same time have butterflies just thinking of his face.
A few weeks ago I was sitting at my desk at work, a normal day at work, annoyed with co-workers, boss is yelling, trying to get my stuff done and I received an email froma friend, I get them everyday, its an online journal “GOD Issues”. In this particular journal entry, I don’t remember exactly the scripture or the topic of the entire entry, but there was a statement within the entry about God’s love for me. God loves me no matter what, no matter how I behave, whether or not I have the perfect job, whether or not I have the most expensive apartment in town, whether or not I have a good or bad day. GOD loves me, accepts me, knows me, HE created me—what else is there ot ask for? Why should I care about what others do or say? HIS opinion is what matters. I know He loves me. I know that he put me here to make the best decisions I could and live the best life I can. Its me and HIM. So I have this realization, I got up from my computer, went out in to the hallway to the bathroom and had to stop and hold on the railing. I felt as though I might fall over, I teared up, and suddenly I was at total peace. A peace I’ve not felt in a long time. I suddenly knew that I am OK. I am going to be OK. Things are going to go the way they are supposed to go and if by chance they do not, well it’s going to be fine because I’ll choose another path, and God will be by my side to muster through that forest just as he has all the others. Why should I feel sorry for myself? Why should I feel bad about my life? I am blessed beyond measure and am continually blessed. I have an amazing friends, they’re not even friends, they are my family. My blood family is wonderful and amazing and inspiring in every way. And I have brand new people in my life that God and only God placed in my path to walk with and muster through the storms with for reasons that only God knows, and I am finding out along the way.
Things were out of sync for a while, I was making decisions and thinking in ways that I have learned from and grown from---finally things are looking to be amazing. The life I’ve always KNOWN I was meant to live is before me and I am in a better place now than I have been in many many months. I feel as though I am Katie D’Ann Mobley again, there for a while I was just an altered version. Now, thanks to God’s love and inspiration and guidance, I am back to me.
So bring on the rain! I am ready to battle the storm, I’ll make it to that beautiful rainbow some how, someway, I will make it there.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Alone...
ALONE:companionless, desolate, detached, individual, in solitary, isolated, lone, lonely, lonesome, onliest, only, on one’s own, single, sole, solitary, solo, stag, unaccompanied, unaided, unassisted, unattached, unattended, unescorted, unmarriedExhausted, mentally, physically, emotionally, exhausted from being...Alone.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
moving on...
Well, last week I made a decision and acted upon it which has kind of thrown my life up side down. After months and months of being unhappy and feeling slighted I quit my job. I just finally had enough and just made the phone call. I can't express enough how relieved I feel to be done with that place and knowing that I will no longer have to wake up with knots in my stomach not knowing what hell I would endure that day. I truly feel like after many nights of prayer and thinking long and hard about what I needed to do, I finally heard God's voice. I think he's probably been telling me all along what I needed to do but I havent truly been listening. I'm thankful that I have an amazing family and am so blessed with amazing friends in my life who have endured hours upon hours of constant complaining and whining from me. I have received so much support from these great people and have heard so much good advice and words of encouragement along the way. Hopefully now I am on a path to happiness, even if I am unemployed right now.
Friday was my last day at my job, I walked out of there with no regrets...except a slight feeling of "what now?!". I do not have a job, I have no income coming in, but it's OK I'll figure it out. I have a really scary interview next week and until I get a good paying job I'll hopefully find a temporary job doing something I've never done before, anything different, anything new, is welcomed.
It's time for change, change is happening. I'm scared out of my mind but I'm ready to do it. With these wonderful people that God has blessed me with in my life, I'll figure out what I need to do. I finally feel as though I can breathe again, and I feel like for the first time in a couple of years my life is in MY hands and I can be myself.
Friday was my last day at my job, I walked out of there with no regrets...except a slight feeling of "what now?!". I do not have a job, I have no income coming in, but it's OK I'll figure it out. I have a really scary interview next week and until I get a good paying job I'll hopefully find a temporary job doing something I've never done before, anything different, anything new, is welcomed.
It's time for change, change is happening. I'm scared out of my mind but I'm ready to do it. With these wonderful people that God has blessed me with in my life, I'll figure out what I need to do. I finally feel as though I can breathe again, and I feel like for the first time in a couple of years my life is in MY hands and I can be myself.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
All of now
All of now The bright sun shines in the clear blue sky. Shimmering waves glisten on a restless sea.
Beauty fills the world. Possibility fills your life.
The problems are real. Yet in each one is the opportunity to move forward.
This sparkling moment is one of a kind. Take it in with love and with gratitude, and remember to live it fully.
This magical mystery that is your life knows only the limits you choose to give it. In the heart of your spirit you can experience anything you decide to experience.
Life is in all of now. See it, feel it and know it as it fills you with wonder and joy
Beauty fills the world. Possibility fills your life.
The problems are real. Yet in each one is the opportunity to move forward.
This sparkling moment is one of a kind. Take it in with love and with gratitude, and remember to live it fully.
This magical mystery that is your life knows only the limits you choose to give it. In the heart of your spirit you can experience anything you decide to experience.
Life is in all of now. See it, feel it and know it as it fills you with wonder and joy
Friday, September 12, 2008
how
Luke 6
Jesus said to his disciples: "To you who hear, I say, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. Stop judging and you won't be judged. Forgive and you will be forgiven."
I'm trying Lord to be forgiving, I'm trying to love my enemies and I am trying to do good to those who have hurt me, and most of all I really honestly amd trying to stay positive and upbeat. It's one of the most difficult things I've ever tried to do. Why at this point in my life do I find it harder to be nice and fake to people than I ever have before? I'm really trying but my patience are being tested, my sanity is being tried and I feel like my overall self and peace of mind is being threatened. How much longer do I do this until I literally have a melt down and not one in private?
Jesus said to his disciples: "To you who hear, I say, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. Stop judging and you won't be judged. Forgive and you will be forgiven."
I'm trying Lord to be forgiving, I'm trying to love my enemies and I am trying to do good to those who have hurt me, and most of all I really honestly amd trying to stay positive and upbeat. It's one of the most difficult things I've ever tried to do. Why at this point in my life do I find it harder to be nice and fake to people than I ever have before? I'm really trying but my patience are being tested, my sanity is being tried and I feel like my overall self and peace of mind is being threatened. How much longer do I do this until I literally have a melt down and not one in private?
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Optimism
Well I think things are starting to look up...
Just as the shit hit the fan and even though dark days are still looming, I saw a glimmer of sunlight at the end of the tunnel and in a week or so I just might be standing in that sunlight with the dark days behind me.
I need strength to be honest and true to myself and fair to myself thruogh these possible changes that I shall soon make.
I do want good things for them, even if they ahve wronged me and others. I hope they've learned a thing or two about working with people along this road. And ifnot, maybe they'll learn with the next one. Someday someone will come in who doesnt put up with it like I have.
The stress and dread is not gone yet, and it wont be until Im gone...but I can feel that it will be soon.
I'm tired of shedding tears over and losing sleep over it and worrying day in and day out about it. Eventually all of that dread and stress will be gone, and if all goes as planned that time will be soon.
On another note, I have come to realize more now than ever just how precious the relationships in my life are. No matter what I am mad, sad, happy, upset, excited about these people in my life, without any complaints otherwise, listen to me and then are mad, sad, happy, excited what ever with me. Thank you, all of you.
Just as the shit hit the fan and even though dark days are still looming, I saw a glimmer of sunlight at the end of the tunnel and in a week or so I just might be standing in that sunlight with the dark days behind me.
I need strength to be honest and true to myself and fair to myself thruogh these possible changes that I shall soon make.
I do want good things for them, even if they ahve wronged me and others. I hope they've learned a thing or two about working with people along this road. And ifnot, maybe they'll learn with the next one. Someday someone will come in who doesnt put up with it like I have.
The stress and dread is not gone yet, and it wont be until Im gone...but I can feel that it will be soon.
I'm tired of shedding tears over and losing sleep over it and worrying day in and day out about it. Eventually all of that dread and stress will be gone, and if all goes as planned that time will be soon.
On another note, I have come to realize more now than ever just how precious the relationships in my life are. No matter what I am mad, sad, happy, upset, excited about these people in my life, without any complaints otherwise, listen to me and then are mad, sad, happy, excited what ever with me. Thank you, all of you.
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